Monday, November 22, 2010

In Which a Number of Things Are History

The Arava's history, as is my shoulder apparently, mwahahaha!

All joking aside, I'm feeling about as gray as the day outside.

The Arava upset my stomach to no end. At first I thought it was something I ate. Then it went on and on and it occurred to me that, no, it wasn't any food, it was the freakin' drug! Not so good.

And today I went to my rheumatologist re my shoulder and confirmed that, so, Enbrel it is.

And speaking of the shoulder, she doesn't really know what's up. Yes, it is stiff and she thinks, a frozen shoulder now. How exciting. Rotator cuff tear? Possibly. Even more exciting.

She thinks its odd, though, that I have had pain even at rest, not just upon movement. Things don't add up in her opinion. Me, I'm just tired.

So she did up an ultrasound recquisition, then I walked down the hall to the X-ray place and submitted myself to torture. Yes, torture. It's all in the name of science and figuring out what's wrong, so it's all good, but definitely not a happy place.

Holding my hand on my lap? Done! Bending my elbow and moving my hand to the side? Not so done. Placing my hand behind my back? You have got to be seriously kidding me! By that point, my eyes were welling up.

The pictures looked cool, though. Kind of like the surface of the moon...

We should have the results in 2-3 days.

I just want my body back.

Monday, November 15, 2010

My Freakin' Shoulder... still killin' me.

Went to see the physiotherapist again today. He had done a reassessment again last week and doesn't think it's a rotator cuff tear. Today, he checked for a pinched nerve. Doesn't seem to be that, either.

Nonetheless, I'm feeling almost constant pain.

Yesterday, I was so beside myself I had to go for a walk because I was desperate to distract myself. I walked and walked and walked. I walked for almost an hour and a half, till I was getting quite tired and my arm was getting sore – this time from hanging at my side for god's sake! Although at least it felt a little more relaxed – I'd told the physiotherapist that my deltoid has been feeling all contracted for some time now, like when you go to a massage therapist and there's a knot, and they push and there's that crazy painlike feeling just before the knot releases? That's how my deltoid has been feeling. Only the last few days, that feeling has spread to my bicep. Then yesterday, the muscle in my forearm joined the fun. WTF???????????????

Yes, I cried.

Bloody freakin' shoulder.

I have an appointment with my rheumatologist next Monday to get her to check it out.

Course, watch: by next week, it'll be just fine!!!

Friday, November 12, 2010


I know I haven't posted in ages.

It's been crazy at work and otherwise somehow. How is it possible to go into the office only 3 days a week and still be crazy busy? But there you go!

Here are some quick updates on what's up in my world:

Shoulder: killing me practically constantly + pain in deltoid and even bicep now at times. Going to go see family doctor in a week when she's back from vacation to see what the heck is going on.

Sleep: Went to sleep clinic. Doctor thought problem wasn't apnea or anything. Tried medication, which worked in terms of prolonging sleep till later. Excellent! Now sleep totally screwed up because of pain of shoulder. Meeting with sleep doctor again next week. Not so excellent. :(

Meds: Trying Leflunomide, aka Arava. Basically, when my benefits run out sometime next year, I'll have to apply for government benefits, and I'll need to have tried Arava. Really don't know the ins and outs of all this. Still need to research everything. I'm keen on it, cause it's way less expensive than Enbrel. Had to laugh at my pharmacist, though, cause when I went to pick it up along with refill of Methotrexate, he said something about it being expensive. I said, "Um, not compared to Enbrel!..." Let's hope it works as well as the Enbrel. Have to admit, I've been so busy, I haven't even researched how well it's supposed to work compared to Enbrel re joint damage, etc. Must find time this weekend to look into everything! And I mean everything!! Just started on it. Pills not injections, too – um, can you say bonus!

That's it, I think! Sorry for the rush!