Hair Loss

Yes, I've been losing hair again. When I started on Methotrexate, for a while my hair was coming out in the shower and gathering in a little clump that I'd have to kick down the drain. Not the best thing to do, I know, but, ick, disgusting! Why is that hair looks so fabulous on your head but is so absolutely sickening when no longer attached to your being???? Blech!

That hair loss finally stopped, thank god, but now Round 2 of the shower kick-downs has begun. And I've been finding loose hairs everywhere around my apartment, which isn't usual. OK, the average person does shed 25-100 hairs a day, but this is way more than that.

Why? I can only think it's because of the stress of being unemployed and worrying about things. I honestly don't feel like I'm totally freaked out about things – really, I'm not! – but, needless to say, the situation does have its emotionally trying moments. I had to go in to my old office to sign my final severance release – stress. I've been figuring out how I'll pay for five prescriptions for RA alone (one of which costs $23,000 a year) when my benefits run out  – stress. I've been thinking about how I'll take care of myself years down the road when I retire now that I don't have a pension in place – stress. You get the picture.

Result: hair everywhere! The technical term for this stress type of hair loss: telogen effluvium. The type that occurs because of the Methotrexate: anagen effluvium. Or, actually, if you read closely, the stress and the start of the new medication could both have caused the first type of hair loss... Whatever! Any way you look at it, I'm losing hair.

Not that anyone on the street would notice. A friend I met for lunch yesterday said she'd expected to see bald patches on my head from what I'd described, but, still, I know what's washing down my drain, and that's dramatic enough for me.

Yet, despite all that, it has been an exciting time. I've launched my new blog, A Capacity for Joy, this past Monday. I've already been approached about writing an architecture piece for a new online magazine based on one of my blog entries. I'm eagerly thinking about what new job opportunities lie ahead for me. I've spent time catching up with family and friends, and I've realized once again what a truly great support network I have.

I hope my hair realizes that, too, and settles down...